At firsts, I panicked, and by 'panicked' I mean, my heart dropped into my stomach, my palms started to sweat, and I do believe the words, "If I don't even know what we are doing, how am I suppose to steer the ship!?" rushed out of my mouth.
Which apparently, was Nate's whole point, a 'gift' in itself.
You would have thought this would have been more of a relief, not having to make the plans, when just days prior I had expressed to a friend that I was just "so tired of the constant, never ending, thinking"
I've never been shy about admitting my need to be in the driver's seat….as a matter of fact, when I was being spoiled during my first ever Hot Stone Message {courtesy of my Sister-in-law's fine decision making} the masseuse kindly asked, mid stone placement, "Samantha, do you like to be in control?" ….."uuuuhm… yes"….. "May I suggest this not be one of those times?"…. roger that.
And though Nate may disagree with me, it's not necessarily that I want to make sure there is a proper outcome for how things are done, but that things are properly done in the first place … or done at all for that matter…Bottom line… the earth will spin off it's own axis if I'm not in a constant state of accomplishing motion, choice choosing, and productively doing…
Now, it wouldn't be fair for me not to give a "job well done" shout out to Nathan for his weekend planning, because it brought us to our best friends, allowed me to cuddle the newest addition to my heart's love, sleep snoringly sound, eat my own food without threatening others to eat theirs, and laugh so hard for two days, my muscles hurt for three days after.
You done good, husband.
It was liberating in the sense that, though most of my day-to-day depends on the momentum of Mumma, it's nice to know, that every once in awhile, I can exercise the releasing of the reigns and the world, to my surprise, kept its alinement.
Happy weekend friends!
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