Tuesday, December 27

Christmas Ease

As happy as I am that this weekend was such an all around delight, I'm just as thrilled that it has come to an end. I've been looked forward to writing about our Christmas all weekend long, I couldn't wait to find the words to describe the excitement that was share by both young and old. How the days hours seamed to grow just long enough to have time for the unrushed tasks of it all.  To not forget to mention how I allowed Nate off the hook, after he voice his opinion that he didn't think pulling Christmas together was really that much work. But now that the time has come to compose all that wonderful into words, I'm not feeling the flow, there is not ease, but much effort, and scattered thoughts of nothing streaming through this mind of mine.

Infact… I just sat here for the last 40 minutes, allowing myself to get sucked into Tabatha's Salon Makeover, finger peking at a random key on the key board to wake up my sleeping computer screen every few minutes, as if it would somehow awake some form of fluency with in me. It hasn't.

I don't know how many times I looked at Nate this past weekend and said, "This weekend has been great… like REALLY great" and I don't know why I was so surprised it would be. But it was.. great.. in so many laced and lingering ways. Other than the obvious of being surrounded by friends and family with moments being captured, while traditions become more secured, the stress level was low and unlike tonight's writing, this is where the flow of ease was carried, with an overwhelming sense of appreciation for those who we got to share it with.

{Christmas aint Christmas until someone streaks… thankfully it was Joey this year}

Now that all is said and done, Santa has come and gone, family hugged and thanked, the last 'because it's Christmas' declared, there is this simmer of needs that boils inside.. the kind that comes at the same time every year… the one that craves for the reigns of control, to all of the chaos, to be tightened, in hand, and redirected… one that magnifies my appreciation for thing having their own place in this household, none cluttered, and clean… and the burning to burry myself deeper into the fibers of this family.

To steep in the days that seem slow in comparison to the last few weeks and indulge in all that there is to be offered within these walls. Enjoy each day's journey, while maintain my daily structure, as I hopefully mange to nestle in its effortless flow.

But for now, the house is still, my bed is calling, with tomorrow looks promising.

Happy finding your flow!

Friday, December 23

Christmas' Eve's Eve

Sometime, when I've got a list of things to remember to do as big as a mile is long, I become manic, chaotic, and down right panicked.

Sometime, when my living room rug screams to be vacuumed, but falls at the very bottom of the above mentioned list, I buckle under the weight of the season and can't think of any reason, not to bundle the kids up, lace up my own boots, and go play outside.

And sometime… When it's the eve of Christmas eve…the snow is falling outside in the most enchanting way, and the finishing touches are being put on the last of a few holiday gifts, I allow myself to get overwhelmed by the greatest of it all.

I have been very conscious today of my now… blame it on the spirit of Christmas but there was this calm but excited energy in our house. A feeling that mirrored all the big things this weekend will bringing with it, but a subtle humbleness that pulsed throughout the day. Is still echoing within our walls and I can only hope that it will carry over, with an even flow as long as it can.

{This is Calvin's recipe book we had to follow, which is not something he gets from me}

To me it's Christmas' eve's eve, that I focus on throughout the year.  It's when the excitement can really flow, because school is on break, extra all's are on a standstill , the reason to deny all the outside pulls, is never more accessible … the 'too soon to start most thing, to late to do others' limbo'd stress is over and I strive to somehow manage to pull off a balance for productivity and play. Kicking off all the most magical time of the year right.

{Coat peanuts with equal parts butterscotch & chocolate chips that are melted together… Mom calls them Peanut Clusters… The kids and I renamed them as Reindeer Evidence}

I'm happy with the balance of today, I can only hope to repeat it tomorrow when the games official begin, but until then, I'll continue to allow She & Him's Christmas album, rock my world right around the Christmas Tree, refuse to acknowledge the amount of candy the kids have eaten, fuel the giddiness that already simmers in my belly with some Christmas cheers, and declare "Kiss me it's Christmas!" until I can't declare it no-mo'.

Tomorrow's list is still long, but I'm feeling as prepared as ever for Santa's arrival, which is more worrisome than I would have thought…. but for now… we wish you a magical weekend from our home to yours.

Merry Christmas friends!


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