Thursday, November 4

Just Having A Moment

Josephine is sleeping in her crib and Calvin has fallen asleep on his "jumping bed".
It's 11:03 AM and the house is still for the first time since 6:00 this morning..

TV is off (weird), and the house is quiet (even more weird). I don't like things to be quiet. I enjoy noise, loud noise, even when I'm alone. But today, it feels right. The sun in hiding behind a grey filled sky and the air is biting with it's "winter is coming" chill.

Here I sit, sipping my Raspberry Zinger Tea, creating a list and contemplating my key strategy to make this weekend's kid free escape to Bangor, for Christmas shopping, the most successful.

Right at this moment, all is right in my world.
It's these quiet moments, the moments between the chaos, that I feel the layers of stress and short patience, tension and urgency's melt away, welcoming the blanket of contentment wrap around me. I feel my energy tank refueling and my "can not only do it all, but do it well" state of mind return.

And it's in this very moments where I realize, the laundry will get done, and so will the dishes, and the floors will be cleaned, but not right now, not in this moment.

This moment is for me. This time is what allows me to be a better mother. A better wife. A better friend.

Joser will wake first and entering her room, I know, I'll be greeted with the biggest and purest of smiles. Though the room is dark, her smile will light it. A smile that she displays with her whole body and eyes that leave no room for doubt, that she's completely in love, and I'm the lucky one she's in love with.

I know, Calvin will remain on his "jumping bed", still, blanket wrapped, eyes closed, but call out "juuuuuuuice" with a still groggy, but hesitated "please" following. Then he will ask for "snuggle me"s. 
Today, I will not only indulge in these snuggles physically, but also men. Not allowing my thoughts to wounder to the bathroom mirror that needs to be desperately cleaned after suffered greatly during this morning's teeth brushing, or the 3 week dust that has collected along the fireplace. With his head resting on my chest, my whole self, will be embracing this moment, participating in the happy ending to Hanny Manny's dilemma of the day. Calvin's energy will soon be reloaded and the "snuggle me" bed, once again will return to the "jumping bed".

Wesley will come home from school, excited to explain to me about the things that excited him most on this day.  He will tell me his stories of Pokemon or Lego's and today, I'll make time to not only listen, but to hear him. And validate his interests as if they are interests of my own.

Shortly, the quietness of this moment, will be replaced with walls that will swell from the effort of trying to keep the overwhelming chaotic noise from seeping out. But because this moment was once here, I will be able to approach the breakdowns, whimpers, tattles and misbehavior, that are guaranteed to come, with a calm level headed approach.

I take a deep breath holding onto this feeling of contentment, as I hear Joey start to stir, knowing that a moment like today never lingers too long, but is powerful during it's stay, and thank it for its visit.....

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